InsaneJournal

Author's notes: "Irasshaimase" means "welcome" and is a greeting Japanese shopkeepers normally call out when a customer walks in. "Kawaii" means "cute". "Moshiwake arimasen" is a form of apology; it literally means "there is no excuse". "Hakushaku" means "Count" and is how D is referred to in Japanese.


Kagome and her companions walked up to the entrance of the Chinatown pet shop. They were an odd-looking trio: a pretty Japanese girl, a little boy with a mischievous glint in his eyes, and a sullen looking young man dressed in a kimono. He wore a bright red bandanna wrapped around his head, and a cascade of white hair spilled out from under the bandanna and fell across his shoulders. People passing by stopped to stare at them.
   
"Honestly," complained Kagome in Japanese. "I don't know why you couldn't just wear modern clothes! Everyone's staring at us!"
   
"Wearing this silly scarf is bad enough," snarled Inu Yasha, tugging at the bandanna. "I refuse to wear those stupid clothes! They make me look like a clown!"
   
Kagome sighed. "Why can't you be more sensible, like Shippo?"
   
Shippo smiled smugly. He had shapechanged into a normal human boy wearing the funny clothes Kagome's people wore. "You look like a clown no matter what you wear!" he taunted.
   
"Why you--!" growled Inu Yasha, reaching out for the boy.
   
"SIT!" shouted Kagome. The necklace of rosary and magatama beads around Inu Yasha's neck began to glow and...
   
BAM! Inu Yasha immediately fell to the ground. "I thought you didn't want to attract attention," he muttered. They had attracted an even larger crowd of onlookers.
   
"Whoops! Heh heh," Kagome giggled nervously. She pulled open the door to the pet shop, and said, "Come along now, you two!"
   
Shippo skipped through the door as Inu Yasha peeled himself off the sidewalk and followed, grumbling, "But he started it..."
   
The onlookers saw them enter the shop, and muttered sagely, "Ah, friends of Count D," as if that explained everything.


They descended the stairs and entered the front room, which looked more like the parlor of a very wealthy and eccentric person than a pet shop. The centerpiece of the room was a couch upholstered in plush red velvet. A slender figure glided forward and said, "Irasshaimase."
   
Kagome was relieved that the shop owner spoke Japanese. She was studying English in high school, but she had missed so many classes recently! "Good afternoon," she replied, in the same language. "You must be Count D."
   
The man stepped forward. Kagome's eyes widened in awe: he was almost inhumanly beautiful, with pale skin and silky black hair that fell across his face, partially obscuring his eyes. They were oddly mismatched--one was purple, the other yellow--but somehow that added to instead of detracting from his beauty. He was the very picture of elegance, clad in an ornate robe of black silk embroidered with red dragons. "And you must be Kagome-san," he said, in a voice as smooth and elegant as the silks he wore.
   
"Y-yes," she stammered. "My...my grandfather called to tell you we were coming?"
   
Inu Yasha growled, a low, rumbling sound that made Kagome jump. Stupid, witless girl, he thought. Mooning over some pretty boy when we're supposed to be looking for the shards! He felt incredibly annoyed, even more so when he saw Shippo's knowing little smirk. I am not jealous! he grumbled to himself. I just hate wasting time while this silly girl is worrying about clothes and men! He growled louder.
   
"Inu Yasha!" scolded Kagome. "Mind your manners! I beg your pardon, Count. These are my...uh...friends. The rude one is Inu Yasha--"
   
"Hey!"
   
"--and this is little Shippo."
   
"I am honored to meet you," said the Count. He turned his gaze upon Inu Yasha. "A dog-demon, if I am not mistaken?" he asked. Then his eyes narrowed as he looked at his visitor more closely. "No, half-demon and half-human," he continued.
   
Inu Yasha pulled off the bandanna he wore, freeing his pointed ears; obviously the disguise wasn't fooling the Count. He glared at D suspiciously. "And just what the hell are you?!" he demanded. There was a strong aura of power about the man. He was not a demon--but he did not seem to be entirely human, either...
   
"Inu Yasha!" protested Kagome.
   
Count D smiled sweetly and said, "I? I am merely the humble owner of a pet shop. I sell love, hope, and dreams to my customers."
   
"I don't know what you sell," snarled Inu Yasha, "but I doubt--"
   
"SIT!"
   
BAM!
   
As Inu Yasha growled and spluttered (the sounds muffled, since his face was pressed into the carpeted floor), the Count calmly turned to Shippo, and said, "Ah, a kitsune cub! Welcome, little one."
   
Shippo transformed back into his normal shape--a young boy with a fox's ears and bushy tail. "You can see through my disguise?"
   
The Count smiled.
   
"My grandfather said you were a remarkable man," said Kagome. "You and he were friends?"
   
"Your grandfather once did a favor for my grandfather," replied the Count. Actually, Grandfather had told D that Kagome's grandfather was an incompetent buffoon, but he had been quite handsome as a young man, not to mention an excellent source of comic relief. But D saw no reason to mention this to Kagome. "And now I am pleased to be able to return that favor," was all he said.
   
"Oh, of course!" exclaimed Kagome, feeling rather silly. Of course Count D was too young to have been friends with her grandfather! "Well, you see...I'm on kind of a quest. I know that sounds silly--"
   
"Not at all," replied the Count pleasantly.
   
Kagome smiled with relief, thinking, Of course, he won't think I'm crazy, if he can see Inu Yasha's and Shippo's true forms! Aloud, she said, "I am gathering the scattered shards of a magical jewel called the Shikon no Tama," and held up a little vial filled with bits of sparkling crystal.
   
"Don't go flashing that thing around, girl!" shouted Inu Yasha.
   
"SI--"
   
"Never mind! Forget I said anything!"
   
"Do not fear," said the Count. "I do not covet the jewel--though you are correct in assuming that others might."
   
Kagome put the vial back in her pocket. "One of the shards somehow crossed space and time, and is here in modern-day Los Angeles. Inu Yasha and I are here to find it. Shippo--" she glared at the boy "--was supposed to stay back home, but he followed us here, and I don't have time to take him back. The shard is probably in the possession of a very powerful and evil creature, and Shippo is not familiar with this time or country--"
   
"I can take care of myself!" he protested.
   
"So I would very much appreciate it if you would look after him while Inu Yasha and I search for the shard," Kagome continued.
   
"I notice you're not worried about me," muttered Inu Yasha.
   
"You have your demon powers and a magical sword," pointed out Kagome. "But if you'd prefer to stay behind--"
   
"Baka! I can't let you go chasing after the shard alone!" As Kagome smiled, he hastily continued, "Not that I'm worried about you or anything! But I intend to get hold of those shards someday, so I can't have you hogging them all to yourself!"
   
"I would be pleased to have Shippo-chan stay with me as my guest," said D. His expression was solemn, but his voice contained a faint hint of amusement.
   
"I don't need a baby-sitter!" wailed Shippo. "I wanna go with Kagome!"
   
"But I have two kitsune in my shop at present," said D, "and I am sure they will be disappointed if they do not get a chance to meet you."
   
"Kitsune?" asked Shippo curiously.
   
Two young men stepped into the room. One was a gaijin clad in jeans, a white t-shirt, and a red leather jacket. He had light brown hair and a charming smile. He looked familiar to Kagome, though she could not recall where she might have seen him before. She had a vague impression that he might resemble some movie or tv actor; she certainly didn't know any Americans personally. The other man looked slightly younger, around Kagome's age, perhaps. His features looked Japanese, but his hair was blonde with pink streaks--done up in messy spikes in front, with the rest braided into a long pigtail that fell to his waist. Kagome thought he looked like the rock musicians and fans who hung out in Harajuku Park back home--his dyed hair; his clothes--black lace-up boots, a gauzy white transparent shirt over a black cropped tank top and shorts; his jewelry--oversized silver cross around his neck, little silver fishes dangling from his ears, rings on several fingers, and some sort of odd cuff or bracelet. On his left wrist he wore a wide band of black leather wrapped around with a silver chain, and his long nails were painted in bright, glittery colors. He looked like he just stepped out of a music video; all he needed was a guitar to complete the picture.
   
"This is FX," said the Count, and the man in the red jacket bowed. "And this is Ten-chan," D continued.
   
"Yo," said the teenage boy, waving to the Count's guests in casual, almost insolent manner.
   
"You're kitsune!" exclaimed Shippo.
   
"Well, duh!" said Ten-chan.
   
"Welcome, little cuz," said FX. "Will you introduce me to your beautiful companion?" He flashed another charming smile at Kagome.
   
Shippo was practically bouncing up and down with excitement. "This is Kagome! And that jerk is Inu Yasha."
   
"Hey!"
   
FX made an extravagant bow to Kagome, saying, "I'm so pleased to make the acquaintance of such a lovely woman!" Kagome blushed and Inu Yasha growled. "I would be more than pleased to look after your little friend, but are you sure you don't need a guide to this city--"
   
"We don't need any help!" snapped Inu Yasha.
   
"Baka," muttered Ten-chan to his cousin. "You're a visitor here, too!"
   
"Details, details," said FX dismissively. "Kitsune don't need a map to get around. I'm quite the accomplished traveler, you know."
   
"You will stay here and look after Shippo-chan," said D firmly.
   
"But thank you for your offer," added Kagome politely.
   
FX smiled and said, "Then I eagerly await your return, my lady."
   
Kagome blushed again, and said, "Thank you so much for your help."
   
"A smile from you is all the thanks I need," replied FX.
   
Ten-chan rolled his eyes. "Laying it on pretty thick, aren't you?"
   
FX turned towards the younger kitsune, retorting, "You just don't know the proper way to treat a lady."
   
Kagome's eyes widened as she saw the four fox-tails attached to FX's jeans-clad rump. And as Ten-chan reached up and brushed back a stray lock of hair away from his face, she noticed that his ears were sharply pointed. Well, thought Kagome, I've certainly seen stranger things before!
   
"Behave yourself, Shippo-chan," she said, giving him a quick hug. "We'll be back soon!"
   
"I wish I could go with you," the kitsune cub whined.
   
"I know, but think of all the fun you'll have visiting your kitsune cousins!"
   
"C'mon kid," said Ten-chan. "We'll show you around the shop."
   
Shippo pouted.
   
"Bet you never had ice cream back in ancient Japan," said FX.
   
"Or heard any J-Pop," said Ten-chan.
   
Shippo looked up curiously. "What's 'ice cream' and 'J-Pop'?"
   
"Come, and we'll show you," coaxed FX. Shippo hesitantly took the older kitsune's hand, and let FX lead him out of the room.


The older kitsune led Shippo to Ten-chan's bedroom. There was not much furniture: a futon lay on the floor, and a small chest of drawers and a mirror doubled as a vanity table--scattered across the top of the dresser were cans of colored hairspray, bottles of nail polish, bits of assorted jewelry, and a hairbrush filled with strands of pink hair. There were also bookshelves made of milk crates filled with American comics and Japanese manga, and a combo CD player/tape deck in the corner. Piles of CDs, cassettes, and dirty clothes lay scattered all over the room. The walls were decorated with posters of various Japanese rock bands, and drawings that Ten-chan had made himself with felt-tip markers. Shippo's eyes widened in awe as he looked around the room. He spotted one particularly amusing drawing of a creature with horns and shaggy, pink fur. A caption below it said, "Sheep-Boy", and scrawled below that, another message in different handwriting that said, "You're dead, Fox-Boy!"
    
"Here, have a seat, kid," said Ten-chan, clearing some space on the futon by heaving a pile of clothes into the corner.
   
Shippo sat, still looking around the room. "Wow!" he exclaimed. "What realistic paintings!" He pointed to a poster of X-Japan in full make-up, and asked, "What kind of demons are those? I've never seen any like them before!"
   
Ten-chan burst out laughing. "Those aren't demons, kid! They're just humans wearing make-up...um...face paint."
   
"I've never seen a human with pink or orange hair before," said Shippo dubiously.
   
Ten-chan fingered a lock of his own pink hair. "This ain't natural either, kid. Comes from a can--like this, see?" He picked up a can of hairspray, and sprayed a pink streak across Shippo's hair, then lifted him up so he could see himself in the mirror.
   
"Wow! Neat!" Ten-chan and Shippo amused themselves by experimenting with hair colors while FX slipped out to get some snacks. By the time he came back, the kitsune cub's hair contained streaks of green, red, and blue in addition to the pink.
   
FX laughed and ruffled Shippo's hair. "You look like a rainbow, little cuz!"
   
The older kitsune had returned with a tray full of goodies pilfered from the Count's kitchen: bowls of French Vanilla ice cream, a platter of chocolate chip cookies, and three tall glasses of Coke garnished with maraschino cherries. (Actually, despite his sweet tooth, the Count disapproved of soft drinks, and only drank tea, but Ten-chan and the other pets liked to keep a stash in the fridge. D pretended not to notice as long as the were discreet about it and drank tea at the meals the pet shop "family" shared together. But to FX's--and Leon's--disappointment, the Count absolutely forbade them to bring beer into the shop, and it would take a braver kitsune than FX to defy the Count. "I want to keep all my tails attached to my butt, thank you very much!" FX had told his cousin when Ten-chan had suggested that they sneak some booze into the shop.)
   
Shippo loved the soda although it took some getting used to ("Whoo! The bubbles went up my nose!"), and he scarfed down the cookies and ice cream greedily. "This is sooo good!" he said with his mouth full. "Kagome brings food from her world back with her sometimes--I really like those fried tuber slices. What does she call 'em? 'Poh-tay-toh chippusu'? But I've never tasted anything like this 'ice cream' stuff before!" He finished his ice cream and licked the bowl clean. "These 'cookies' are great too! Kagome gave me some once, but they weren't as good as these."
   
"That's because I made these," drawled a sarcastic voice behind him.  Shippo turned to see a young man of indeterminate age leaning in the doorway. He had shoulder length hair that was an odd shade of pinkish-red (The same color as the drawing of Sheep-Boy, come to think of it, mused Shippo), orange eyes, and a rather sour expression on his face. He looks just as grouchy as Inu Yasha--they oughta get together! He wore an orange vest--just a shade lighter than his eyes--over his bare chest, and white pants that were loose and baggy, but tied off tightly at the waist with a sash and at the ankles with embroidered cuffs. He also wore wide gold bracelets on his wrists, and a necklace strung with what looked like animal fangs or claws. But strangest of all were the two curved, goat-like horns growing out of his head! "Are you a demon?" asked Shippo, more excited than frightened. Maybe he has the Shikon shard! I could get it by myself--then Kagome and Inu Yasha will be sorry they left me behind!
   
"Maybe," said the man, giving Shippo a nasty grin. "I'm a Tou Tet--a man-eating beast from China. I like the taste of human flesh--but a little kitsune cub might make a nice snack!"
   
Shippo squealed and darted behind Ten-chan, and all his thoughts of impressing Kagome by fighting a demon vanished from his mind. "Don't let him eat me!" he wailed.
   
Ten-chan snorted. "Don't be afraid of Sheep-Boy here."
   
"I AM NOT A SHEEP!!!" bellowed the Tou Tet.
   
Kitsune instinct took over in Shippo; he shapechanged into the biggest, ugliest demon he could imagine--a monstrous, vaguely reptilian shape with huge fangs and claws, body covering in warts and scales, venomous-looking slime dripping from his mouth. "YAAAH!" he yelled, trying to sound scary.
   
"Baka! Do I look stupid enough to fall for kitsune tricks?" The Tou Tet walked right up to Shippo and punted him across the room like a football.
   
FX darted across the room, saying, "...And he's headed for the end zone! The crowd goes wild!" The shrieking kitsune cub fell safely into his arms. "It's OK, little cousin, I've got you," FX said soothingly. He wagged a finger at the horned creature, saying, "You should be ashamed of yourself, picking on a little kid!" He tried to sound stern, but a hint of laughter crept into his voice. "Especially since Shippo's a guest here! Really, Tet-chan, I should tell D on you!"
   
"You wouldn't dare!" said Tet-chan.
   
To Shippo's ears, he sounded surprisingly nervous for such a fierce demon. And what was it FX had just called him..."Tet-chan?" asked Shippo incredulously. "What kind of demon is called 'chan'?"
   
Ten-chan, was lying on the floor, laughing his head off. He held his stomach and kicked his legs in the air, laughing uncontrollably. And to think I didn't want to baby-sit for D's friends! he thought. This is the best entertainment I've had in weeks! "HA HA HA! He's no demon--he's just an oversized sheep!"
   
"For the hundredth time--I am NOT a sheep!"
   
Shippo poked his head up, feeling a little braver, but he hung on tightly to FX's jacket, just in case. "You mean he's 'Sheep-Boy'?"
   
Tet-chan's face began turning an interesting shade of red. He spluttered and huffed, so angry that he was unable to form a coherent sentence: "...not...sheep...kitsune...baka..."
   
Ten-chan calmly grabbed his pens and started working on the sketch of "Sheep Boy" on his wall. He colored Sheep Boy's face red, added several angry "tic" marks on his face, and sketched in little steam clouds of rage emanating from his head. Ten-chan gnawed on the end of his pen thoughtfully, murmuring, "It just isn't right...it needs a little something more..."
   
"How 'bout this?" asked FX, picking up a black marker and drawing a mustache on Sheep Boy.
   
"Nice touch, cuz!" said Ten-chan approvingly.
   
"I wanna play too!" said Shippo. He grabbed a pen at random--green--and began drawing stripes and polka dots on Sheep Boy's fur.
   
By now Tet-chan's face had gone from red to purple.
   
"The kid's got artistic talent, don't you think, Ten-chan?"
   
"He surely does, FX!"
   
Tet-chan exploded. "AAAAAARRRGGHHH!!!"
   
Shippo almost jumped out of his skin. Frightened, the kitsune cub began to cry. "Waaaaahh!"
   
"What on earth is going on here?!" exclaimed a voice that was smooth and velvety, but extremely annoyed.
   
"Count D!" exclaimed Ten-chan, FX, and Tet-chan in unison.
   
"Well?" demanded the Count, tapping a slippered foot impatiently on the floor.
   
"It was all his fault!" the trio chorused, pointing fingers at each other.
   
The Count scooped up Shippo in his arms and crooned comfortingly, "There, there, little one, everything is all right; there is nothing to fear." Tet-chan eyed the cub jealously. As Shippo sniffled and wiped his eyes, D glared at the two older kitsune, who looked sheepish, and Tet-chan, who stared back defiantly, but gradually wilted under his master's disapproving gaze. "I do not care whose fault it is," he said coldly. "You should all be ashamed of yourselves for scaring the poor child! "
   
FX laughed nervously. "We were just playing around," he said giving the Count his most  charming and ingratiating smile.
   
"Yeah," muttered Tet-chan sulkily. "Just playing around. I wasn't going to hurt him or nothing."
   
"I expect you to behave more responsibly. Honestly, you three are just as bad as the Detective!"
   
Tet-chan pouted, and Ten-chan said, "Jeez, Count, don't you think that's kind of a low blow?" D gave him an icy glare. "I guess not."
   
FX bowed deeply, and said, "Moshiwake arimasen, D-Hakushaku. We are deeply ashamed of the way we have behaved--aren't we, dear cousin, dear friend?" He kicked his cousin in the shin, and gave the Tou Tet a pointed look. Ten-chan and Tet-chan bowed and muttered reluctant apologies.
   
D seemed somewhat mollified, if not exactly pleased. Shippo stuck out his tongue at Tet-chan, who ground his teeth in frustration. "I've gotta get back to the kitchen," he growled. I'll have to make a really spectacular dessert to get back into the Count's good graces, he thought. When what I'd really like to serve up is a roasted kitsune! Three of them, in fact!
   
As Tet-chan turned to leave, Shippo asked sweetly, "Will you make me some more of those cookies?"
   
"Yes, that sounds like a good way to make up for how you treated our guest," said D. Shippo gave Tet-chan his most innocent, angelic smile.
   
Tet-chan started to snarl, but one look from D stopped him. "One batch of chocolate chip cookies coming right up," he said through gritted teeth. And may you choke on them! he added silently as he stalked off.
   
The Count's stern look gave way to one of amusement. He gently set Shippo down on the floor. "I will leave you with your cousins now," he said, patting the cub on the head affectionately. "The three of you play nicely together, now," he admonished, a mischievous gleam in his oddly colored eyes.
   
"Yes, Count," the three kitsune chorused meekly.
   
The Count left the room, knowing that they would no doubt be up to mischief again as soon as his back was turned. "But such is the nature of the kitsune," murmured the Count to himself. "Mischief and trickery run in their blood; I suppose they cannot help themselves. Still, perhaps three kitsune is more than one household can bear..."
   
"Kyu, kyu!" squeaked Q-chan impatiently, breaking D's train of thought.
   
The Count laughed. "Yes, little one, I know it is time for tea." He held out his hand, and the tubby little bat fluttered down and landed on it. "I suppose everything will be all right. FX is only visiting, and Kagome and her friend will return soon to claim the cub."
   
"Kyu!"
   
"We can bear a little chaos for a brief time," said the Count. "After all, he can hardly be more trouble than the Detective."
   
"Ki kii! Ki gii!" squeaked Q-chan derisively.
   
"No, I certainly do not think that we should feed the Detective or the cub to Tet-chan!" D said indignantly.
   
"Kyu," sighed Q-chan, as if to say, "Well, it was worth a shot."


The three kitsune sat on the floor, drinking glasses of chocolate milk and gorging themselves on chocolate chip cookies still warm from the oven, while X-Japan's "Jealousy" album played in the background.
   
Ten-chan licked melted chocolate from his fingers. "You're very good at appeasing the Count," he grudgingly conceded to his cousin.
   
FX smiled modestly. "When one has only three--or four--tails, one becomes quite good at talking one's way out of trouble, purely out of self-defense. A nine-tail like you has the power to take on a Tou Tet or even a dragon and come out with your hide intact, but I would end up being called 'Stumpy' for the rest of my very short life!" He shuddered and his tails twitched in sympathy at the thought. "Did I ever tell you about the time Chinthliss the dragon threatened to change my name to 'Mulch'?"
   
Ten-chan rolled his eyes. "Only about a hundred times!"
   
Shippo's eyes widened. His expression of awe, combined with the chocolate-milk mustache on his face was quite comical, and the two older kitsune grinned at the sight. "You fought a dragon?" the cub exclaimed.
   
"Oh no, here we go again," muttered Ten-chan.
   
FX ignored his cousin and sat up straight, fanning his tails out behind him elegantly like a peacock's tail, and puffing out his chest with pride. "Well, you see, kid, it was like this..." he said, explaining the story of how his human friend, Tannim, unwittingly became entangled with a nine-tailed kitsune maiden; how her Unseleighe elven allies used her to capture him; and what happened when Tannim's foster-father, who just happened to be a powerful dragon-mage, came looking for his son. "...and I told him it was too dangerous to mess around around with a nine-tail like Lady Shar, but Chinthliss grabbed me by the throat and said--" FX perfectly imitated the dragon's deep, rumbling tone of voice "--'A nine-tailed kitsune is not the only thing that can change your name to "Stumpy". I can change your name to "Mulch"!'"
   
Ten-chan yawned in boredom, having heard this story many times over, but Shippo's eyes were round as saucers. "Wow! So how did you keep him from killing you?"
   
"Oh, a little groveling, a little humor," replied FX. "It's amazing how well laughter defuses a tense situation. Keep 'em too busy laughing to beat the crap out of you, that's my motto!"
   
"You might wanna start learning some jokes, kid," said Ten-chan. "Seeing as how you've only got one tail!"
   
"Hey, that's right!" said FX. He grinned, looking pleased. "I'm not the one with the fewest tails anymore!"
   
"One-tail, one tail!" taunted Ten-chan.
   
"So what?!" snapped Shippo, thrusting out his lower lip in a pout. "I'm just as good as any of you! I've fought lots of demons with Kagome and Inu Yasha!"
   
"Yeah, like you 'fought' Tet-chan?" sneered Ten-chan. "'Ooh, please don't eat me!'" he said in an exaggeratedly high, squeaky whine.
   
"Why you--" growled Shippo. He lunged at Ten-chan, but the nine-tailed kitsune simply clamped his hand down on the cub's head, holding him at arm's length as Shippo's little fists swung wildly. Ten-chan yawned, not in the least concerned since none of the blows came close to hitting him.
   
"Hey FX, how many tails do you have?" asked Ten-chan casually.
   
"Ichi, ni, san, yon," counted FX happily, giving each tail a loving stroke as he counted it. He continued in English, "One, two, three, four..." And just because he so enjoyed having a fourth tail after being a 3-tail for so long, he counted in Spanish, "Uno, dos, tres, quatro..." He was just starting to count in French when Ten-chan interrupted him.
   
"And how many do I have?"
   
"Nine, of course."
   
"And how many do you have, little cousin?"
   
Shippo growled and continued throwing punches that got nowhere near Ten-chan. FX helpfully answered, "One!"
   
"One-tail!" Ten-chan taunted the younger cub.
   
FX actually liked the little cub, but couldn't resist joining his cousin in teasing Shippo. After all, he had been low man on the totem pole--so to speak--for so long, that it was a nice change to have someone to lord it over.
   
"One-tail! One-tail!" The two kitsune chorused. "One-tail! One-tail!"
   
"Waaaaahhh!!!"
   
"Shit, the Count will hear him!" cursed Ten-chan, clamping a hand over Shippo's mouth.
   
A few moments later, the Count appeared in the doorway again. FX grabbed the cub, and gave him a bear hug, holding him tightly against his chest to smother any cries. "Is everything all right in here?" D asked suspiciously.
   
"Sure, everything's fine!" said FX heartily. "We're getting along great! I really love my little cuz!" He hugged Shippo even tighter.
   
"Mmmph! Mmmph!" Shippo protested.
   
"I believe he is having trouble breathing," said D dryly.
   
FX loosened his grip. Shippo was too busy gasping for air to complain. As soon as it looked like he had caught his breath, Ten-chan quickly shoved a cookie into his mouth.
   
"Mmmph!"
   
"Yeah, you really love those cookies, don't ya?" grinned Ten-chan, slapping the cub on the back affectionately.
   
"Mmmph mmph mmph," said Shippo around a mouthful of cookie.
   
"He's certainly having a great time here, aren't you, little cuz?" asked FX.
   
"Mmmph!"
   
"See? He agrees!" FX and Ten-chan each slung an arm around Shippo's shoulders and beamed at the Count innocently.
   
The Count gave them a stern look. The two kitsune only smiled wider, practically radiating sincerity. Shippo sighed and stopped struggling, resigning himself to his fate.
   
"Very well," said the Count. "But I do not want to hear anymore commotion from this room--is that clear?"
   
The three kitsune nodded.
   
After D left, Shippo managed to chew and swallow the cookie in his mouth. "Gah! Were you guys trying to choke me?!"
   
"Just trying to save our tails," replied FX. "I don't have that many to spare."
   
"More than me," sighed Shippo, looking at his one tail despondently.
   
FX, who was more softhearted than he liked to admit, said a little guiltily, "Hey, don't sweat it, kid. Sometimes having only a few tails can be a good thing."
   
"What do you mean?"
   
"Well, since you don't have much power, you have to learn to be really clever and use your brains to get out of trouble. You could say it teaches you to be...um...creative."
   
Ten-chan snorted, but did not contradict him.
   
"And you try harder...someone like Ten-chan can sit on his duff all day if he likes, since he already has nine tails--"
   
"Hey!"
   
"But you and I have to work really hard and try our best to get more tails."
   
"Maybe I can earn another tail by helping Kagome and  Inu-Yasha?" asked Shippo hopefully.
   
FX chuckled and ruffled Shippo's hair affectionately. "Maybe, little cuz! And sometimes having a good heart is worth more than a tail. That adventure I told you about? It ended with my friend Tannim getting hurt real bad--a dragon's claw pierced his heart. His girlfriend Shar was hysterical, and almost ready to give up hope. Being a gentleman--" he grinned and winked "--I hung around and tried to comfort her. Gave her a shoulder to cry on and told her not to give up. I had faith in Tannim; I knew he was too tough to die! And he did make it! Afterwards, Shar told me that I gave her strength--me, a lowly three-tail! And she was a nine-tail herself! So you see, kiddo, there are things more important than tails." He scratched his head sheepishly. "Sorry we gave you a hard time."
   
"It's OK," smiled Shippo. "My Dad only had one tail, but he saved me and Kagome's life."
   
"Oh?" asked Ten-chan, his ears pricking up. "Sounds like quite a story."
   
Shippo grinned. "It is! But it's a long story, and my throat is dry...pass the milk and cookies, please?"

[Author's note: See books 3 and 4 of the Inu Yasha graphic novels for Shippo's background, and "The Chrome Circle" by Mercedes Lackey for the complete story on Tannim, Shar, and FX.]


Shippo had a grand time during his stay at the Count's shop. He played games with the little raccoon girl, Pon, and went swimming with Phillip the dolphin. He watched something called "videos" with FX--Shippo was fascinated by the images of people somehow captured and displayed in a large box. FX was very fond of a "movie" he called "Rebel Without a Cause" that was about some guy who looked just like FX. Or was it the other way around? Shippo didn't understand what the movie was about, but was captivated by the sheer novelty of it, and besides, he loved the salty, greasy food called "popcorn" that FX always ate while watching movies. Unfortunately, the Count forbade any more video-watching after a late-night horror movie fest that resulting in Shippo having nightmares about being chased by man-eating zombies and the Creature from the Black Lagoon. So Shippo spent more time with his other "cousin," Ten-chan, who played him music by "J-Rock" bands, some of whom looked even scarier than the Creature from the Black Lagoon, in Shippo's opinion. But their favorite pastime was terrorizing Tet-chan...

"AAARRGH! Who's been drawing graffiti on my walls?!"
   
Ten-chan leaned in the doorway of the Tou-Tet's bedroom, grinning. "Looks like a pretty good likeness to me, goat-boy!"
   
"I am not a goat!"
   
"I thought you said he was a sheep, Ten-chan," said Shippo innocently.
   
"You mangy little mutt," growled Tet-chan
   
Shippo pulled down his lower eyelid and stuck out his tongue at the Tou-Tet.
   
"Why you--!" Tet-chan snarled, reaching out and grabbing the kitsune cub by the tail. He raised Shippo to eye-level and flexed his claws. "I'll make fox shish-kebabs out of you, mutt!"
   
Shippo only smiled at the Tou-Tet. "Count D!" he shouted. "Tet-chan's picking on me!"
   
"Shit!" Tet-chan exclaimed, dropping the cub, and fleeing for the kitchen.


Shippo was sitting on the couch, sipping tea and gobbling pastries, while D looked on affectionately, and Tet-chan watched with a sour expression his face. He had baked up a storm that morning, hoping to keep the cub too stuffed to make trouble. So far it seemed to be working.
   
"Good cream puffs, eh kid?" asked FX.
   
"Mmmff! Mm-hmm!" Shippo grinned and nodded, his mouth full.
   
"The little one so enjoys your pastries," said D sweetly. "Isn't that nice?"
   
"Yeah, that's just great," growled Tet-chan.
   
Suddenly the door swung open with a loud creak.
   
"Kagome!" shouted Shippo, jumping up and running over to hug her. "You're back!"
   
"Oh, thank God!" said Tet-chan fervently. "Thank Buddha, thank Kami-sama, thank Allah..."
   
Ten-chan snickered. "Why, I didn't know you were so devout, Sheep-Boy!"
   
Tet-chan was so relieved, he didn't even bother to make a retort.
   
Kagome hugged Shippo and kissed him on the cheek.
   
"Ah..." sighed FX enviously. "To be a kawaii little cub again..."
   
"You've got custard all over your face, Shippo-chan!" Kagome laughed, taking out a handkerchief to wipe his face. "Did you behave yourself?"
   
"Uh-huh!"
   
"Oh, he was a perfect angel," said Ten-chan, with a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.
   
"Somehow I find that hard to believe," muttered Inu Yasha.
   
Tet-chan gave the half-demon a sympathetic look. "You're telling me!" he said.
   
"I hope he wasn't too much trouble," said Kagome to the Count.
   
"Oh, not at all! We enjoyed having him here."
   
Speak for yourself! Tet-chan thought silently, not daring to say it aloud.
   
"I missed you, Kagome," said Shippo, hugging her again.
   
"Hey, what about me?!" asked Inu Yasha indignantly.
   
Shippo stuck out his tongue. "Who'd miss you?" he asked.
   
"Why you little brat--" snarled Inu Yasha, reaching for the kitsune cub.
   
"SIT!"
   
BAM!
   
A moment later, Inu Yasha groaned in pain as he lay sprawled out flat on the floor.
   
"Would you like to stay and have some tea with us?" asked the Count.
   
"No, I'm sorry, but we must get back home as soon as possible," replied Kagome. She bowed to the Count, then to FX and Ten-chan. "Thank you so much for your help!"
   
"Not at all," said D. "Please come see us again the next time you are in town."
   
Which hopefully will be when hell freezes over, thought Tet-chan.
   
"It was my pleasure, Lady Kagome," said FX, bowing over her hand as he kissed it in a courtly fashion. She blushed and giggled.
   
"OK, fox-boy, you can stop slobbering on her hand now," growled Inu Yasha.
   
"SIT!"
   
BAM!
   
Tet-chan helped Inu Yasha peel himself off the floor. "I feel for you, buddy," he whispered. "If you think one kitsune is bad, try living with three of 'em!"
   
"I was kind of hoping we could leave him here permanently," muttered Inu Yasha.
   
"What was that?" asked Kagome suspiciously.
   
"Nothing! Nothing at all!"
   
"Goodbye Count! 'Bye FX, Ten-chan!" said Shippo.
   
"See ya, cuz," said Ten-chan.
   
"Take care, little cousin," said FX. "Maybe next time we meet, you'll have another tail!"
   
Shippo grinned and waved, and Kagome bowed once more, then the trio left.
   
"Ahhh, peace and quiet at last!" sighed Tet-chan happily.
   
"Hey, what happened to all the food?" asked Ten-chan. They all turned to look and see that the plates on the coffee table contained only crumbs.
   
"Kyuuuu!" squeaked Q-chan in dismay.
   
"Why that little brat!" shouted Tet-chan. "He must've swiped the pastries!"
   
"What?!" exclaimed D, and the pets all cringed. One thing you didn't do was mess with the Count's sweets! But then, he sighed and said, "Well, I suppose I should be glad the shop in still in one piece, after having three kitsune under one roof at the same time! He is only a child, after all."
   
"You're taking this surprisingly well," said Tet-chan warily.
   
D smiled and stroked Tet-chan's hair. "You will make a new dessert for me, won't you?"
   
The Tou Tet grinned. Now this is more like it! he thought. Aloud, he said, "Right away, Count! We just got some fruit delivered from the market--how about a raspberry-chocolate torte?"
   
"That sounds wonderful, Tet-chan."
   
Tet-chan raced back to the kitchen. Life was back to normal at Count D's!

Meanwhile...as the odd-looking trio walked down the street, Shippo reached into his pocket and pulled a slightly squashed cream puff. "Hey, Kagome, would you like a cream puff?" he asked.

THE END.